Stanley Ilenda

Dear Stanley,

Its first year of college and you have escaped secondary school. Congratulations. Its your second chance to make friends and build connections. This is first time you will become unshackled by your parents and decide how far you will push away from their rules and regulations. You will also experience being attracted to a girl who also likes you back, “WOOP WOOP”. No matter what new things are presented to you, go with your gut, because you know right from wrong. Trust in God; keep sharpening your resolve and faith daily as it will become the rock that guided us through up until today.

You’re not the only one trying to figure things out so don’t stress about it. Enjoy the journey, you may not party or do more conventional things teens do at your age but talking about anime and playing poker will become gems in your college experience. Our complacency will catch up with us here, your grades aren’t the best but we do get into university, where we can play basketball and FINALLY have our own room. I would say study more but Brunel becomes the place you make life long friends and the woman you will share your life with. So all’s well that ends well.

Uni will be the first time you're truly alone, as for an introvert like us basketball and luck will help you make friends so don’t worry about that. Basketball will be your first love, you will make friends, learn to push yourself and turn your chubby belly into a 6-pack. I know you're already thinking this, and yes, we do dunk, and it feels good. All those nights of meditating on the word will help to be you; in a room full of strangers don’t feel any qualms about being honest. Funnily enough, you being a virgin actually makes women want to have sex with you more. Who knew? You’re going to spend frivolously, I would say be wiser, but takeaway food and club nights will provide catalysts for some of your best experiences.

You're going to have a few kids but don’t be alarmed. It may sound daunting, but don’t fret. Your “Seum Seum” aka wife is amazing, and even where you make mistakes and fall short, grace and wisdom will help you to be a good father and husband.

Living with your mother and wife at the same time may be the toughest experience thus far. You're going to make mistakes and let down your wife. In times of need and doubt go back to your faith, revise the principles that will allow you to steady the ship across the tricky waters.

I made the mistake of trying to do it on my own and my marriage was shaken because of it. Its not all bad though, during this period you will fall in love with design again.

We can’t draw anymore because we neglected our gifts. Our gifts are our blessings, so write that down somewhere and stick it on your wall.

There will be ups and downs but I believe they will ultimately help us finish the race strong. So now burn this letter and forget everything that I have told you. Experience a life anew.

P.S. "Stay unashamed", Rom 1:16


25 Year Old Stanley

Contributed by Stanley Ilenda


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